Phonecalls poll

[enismirdal]

When growing up, I always believed I was a real freak because I HATED using the phone and would avoid it at all costs. Even now, if there's a Really Important Phonecall I have to make, I have to mentally prepare and end up scheduling it at a particular time so I don't put it off and put it off. I had started to believe I was the only person in the universe with this problem and I was just pathetic.

But more and more I've noticed my friends make similar statements, especially when phoning people they don't know. So...to investigate how widespread this phenomenon is...

[Poll #1236883]

I also wonder how much correlation there might be between being a loner as a kid and hating phones as an adult - all the "popular" kids when I was growing up were on the phone to each other all the time, priding themselves on their enormous mental phonebook. Whilst I didn't do that stuff nearly so much, so didn't get as much practice at talking to friends' batty grandparents or parents, asking, "Is Louise in, please?"

Comments

[ilanin.livejournal.com]

Oh, except what I really hate is *calling* people, I can just about survive answering the phone.

[enismirdal.livejournal.com]

Agreed - I feel like if they're phoning me, I have the upper hand. I actually quite like answering the phone these days, cos I get to see who it is! (Though I'm not so keen when flatmate's parents phone from India as the line is AWFUL and I have to hear my own voice echoed back.)

[filius-lupi.livejournal.com]

Echo-y lines! Arggg!!! I have been known to just hang up on them when I get calls like that after taking down the number from the display, then ring them back - pretty much everyone is actually okay about it and says "I don't blame you" and I can always pretend the 'phone dropped it without my help (happens about twice a day anyhow)...

[alexcat.livejournal.com]

I had 15 phone calls yesterday... I loved some of them... from Bee, Luin and Larian in particular but the rest just got on my nerves! I couldn't even use the potty without someone calling.

[filius-lupi.livejournal.com]

Hate them all, always have done... and engage in dozens of them a day at work. I approach each one I make with a "game plan" to put it nicely: I know exactly what I am going to communicate; I break in as efficiently as I can; I dump the info; I get out.
Incoming, I process and chop up as much as I can, destroy in detail and close or pass on (giving an info-dump to the new recipient as above) as fast as I can.

Unfortunately, there's a general impression that "Philip's good at 'phones" and/or "Philip's the only one who understands what's happening with x" that means I get to make more and more of the things if I'm not quick enough to dodge.

[naurring.livejournal.com]

Calling people you don't know is aweful. If I want to get it done I need to do it in the same second in which I think 'I need to call', before I have time to think about it and get uneasy. And I hate answering the phone. Again the unknown people thing. You never know who calls. I also have a real aversion to answering machines. I never speak on them, I rather hang up without saying anything and try again later.

[enismirdal.livejournal.com]

*nods* My supervisor's been quite helpful for that - he doesn't mind phones one bit (in any of at least three different languages), so tends to suggest, "Why don't you phone X?" without even thinking about it. So I know that if I don't do it, he won't understand and will be annoyed, so I have to just get on and make the call.

[silver-trails.livejournal.com]

I used to get a bit nervous about making phone calls to people I don't know, but it got better with time, and since my divorce I don't mind at all.

[silver-trails.livejournal.com]

Oh, I wouldn't like people calling me all day, though. :)

[lauand.livejournal.com]

I've got an aversion towards talking to people I don't know, but it's indifferent if it's by phone or in person.

[rjw76]

I've got better at it, after two weeks of calling alumni for college. Mostly I think I hate phones because I work very visually so often find people hard to understand without watching their mouths/reading the words on the screen.

(yes, I have been tested for being deaf, it turns out that I just prefer to semi-lipread :) )

[enismirdal.livejournal.com]

I know where you're coming from - my brain hates processing audio input without any visuals to back it up, so phonecalls can be pretty hard work just making sure I don't miss anything important and take in all the necessary information. I'd much rather just fire off an e-mail!

[mirien.livejournal.com]

The only thing I hate worse than having to make An Important Phonecall, is when I do muster the nerve and the motivation and then the person I need to speak to is not there and I have to wait for a call back. In the time I'm waiting, I fret and fidget, I can't do anything just in case they call and OMG I'm thinking about something else!, and I have to keep the phone with me while I mentally rehearse all over again what I need to say. Ugh, horrid, phonecalls like that turn me into a total basket case.

[emperor]

I don't mind being phoned, but I dislike phoning people, especially if I've not spoken to them on the phone, or I want something from them.

[fairjennet.livejournal.com]

Whew, I'm glad I'm not the only one. Phone calls of all kinds give me the heebie jeebies.

[enismirdal.livejournal.com]

Apparently, at least in terms of LJ, you're part of a substantial majority!

[beckyc.livejournal.com]

I'm a chatterbox with my friends (unless they're a bit phone-phobic) but not fond of calls to people I don't know. I like being able to screen my incoming calls.

[eveiya.livejournal.com]

Yup - loner and all-round phone hater here. My parents didn't have a phone installed in the house until the early 1980s, when I was about fifteen or sixteen, and I don't think I ever used a phone at all before that. I left my parents' home at eighteen, and never lived in a place with a phone for another decade or so. I guess I never really got used to the things. I do have a home landline and a mobile now, but I still make very, very few personal calls, and I very often just don't bother answering my phones at all.

Weirdly, however, I enjoy covering the constantly busy frontdesk switchboard at work, and have no problem at all with taking and making calls generally at work.

I think what it boils down to is that I'm not really one for small talk and chitchat. Talking about my life stuff generally bores me no end - I only have the urge for it once in a blue moon - and listening to other people yatter about their everyday doings is usually equally unappealing; I'm just not interested, and rarely see the point in trying to pretend to be. Work phone calls are a different matter because they're functional, or - with the nature of my job - they can be bizarre, perplexing, abusive or simply insane, all of which I find entertaining.

I think I'm much the same in face-to-face conversation, too. I've nothing to say for myself at most parties and social gatherings and generally can well live without them, but in work meetings, tutorials, etc, chances are I'll be amongst the gabbiest, or given a willing or a captive audience, I can wax lyrical on any of my many topics of geeky interest pretty much endlessly...

[melime.livejournal.com]

Heh, you may have seen my post recently where I had to write out a possible dialogue for myself in order to prep myself for a follow-up-on-interview phone call. XD

I used to have a REALLY hard time calling ANYONE, even calling out for pizza or chinese take-out. My friends and I always had a 'not-it' fight for it.

I was really panicking when I found out I was going to have to call people for work. :/ But actually it's really helped me get over it -- in some cases. I can call doctor's offices to make appointments for myself with ease now, but I still have a hard time calling for interview-related things and the like.

[enismirdal.livejournal.com]

Yep - your post was one of the things that got me thinking.

I'm OK phoning for pizzas and curry and whatnot these days (except I feel my heart sink when the phone is answered by someone with a really strong Bengali accent, as me + phone + accent results in me answering their questions with complete nonsense as what I thought they asked and what they actually asked are often entirely different...)

I'm glad work has helped you! Unfortunately my work involves calling basically no one (except my second supervisor from time to time) so I don't get the practice!

[misswilde.livejournal.com]

I speak to people all day at work, and it's absolutely fine - I like doing it, especially calling people back, as it's productive and helpful and gives me that warm 'problem solved!' satisfaction.

On the other hand, I HATE ringing people I know (close family excepted). I worry that I'm calling at the wrong time, sounding as if I'm after something, awkward silences...I have been known to ignore phone calls too, as I just don't want to speak to anyone!

[nienna-weeper.livejournal.com]

I despise my cell phone especially. But I have it because I'm a mom.

[enismirdal.livejournal.com]

Heee! Funny really, how 20 years ago virtually no mums would carry mobile phones, and even 10 years ago schools completely banned them and would confiscate them from schoolkids. Now I assume they've just given up the battle and most parents would prefer their kids to have a phone just in case of emergencies!

[nienna-weeper.livejournal.com]

Mine is only (almost) 10 and she wants one. She tells me 'all her friends have them.' I doubt this. I told her she could probably have one when she gets into high school. She thought that completely unfair, of course.

[rochvelleth.livejournal.com]

This is making me feel much better, thank you for posting it! :) I've always thought I'm a bti of a freak for not liking phones.

[enismirdal.livejournal.com]

No problem! I've found it fascinating too - I didn't expect such a huge majority of my Flisters to dislike phones!

[divulge.livejournal.com]

I hate phoning people about 'official' things like banks or employers or things; and I dislike answering my landline because I don't know who it will be (hence not giving the number to anyone except my mother). Mobiles are better because I know who is calling so can answer, or not, as I wish.
Talking to friends on the phone is okay, but I always hated asking 'May I talk to Louise, please?' to random family members.
(Though interestingly, I worked on a phone helpline for a few years and it didn't scare me to answer those phones - maybe because it was okay for me to not know who it would be on the other end.)
Sorry for long rambly comment!